Congratulations Leavers, you have the Brexit you always wanted!

To all you bakers and fans of buttered toast, I am sorry to inform you that there is some bad news. Lurpak, the king of butters, has been seen priced at £9.35 for a one kilo pack in Iceland, and is sold at Sainsbury’s (online and in store) for £7.25 for a tub of 750g

Pet owners should also beware, as Mars, the US owner of Whiskas, Dreamies and Pedigree, has stopped supplies to Tesco in another row over price gouging. Tesco has yet to resolve a dispute with ketchup and baked bean supremo Heinz (don’t give me your Branston beans, thanks), which also paused its supermarket supply this week due to price increases.

The UK is facing the highest inflation in 40 years. I’m not an economist, I’ll admit it from the start: I generally leave global market trends to my esteemed colleague Hamish McRae. But it’s clear even to a layman that something is seriously wrong here, and we’re paying a seriously inflated price for it.

This is not some kind of Remoaner conspiracy, built to sow discord and fear in happy and pleasant days for our green and pleasant earth. It should be abundantly clear by now that Brexit has not brought the much-lauded benefits that some believed it would bring, and has instead given us some very tangible and concrete disadvantages, reflected in our shopping baskets in supermarkets, and made us the laughing stock abroad.

The ONS has confirmed that inflation in Britain rose 9.1 percent in the 12 months to May. Other European countries are experiencing cost-of-living crises to varying degrees, but we are the outliers in the G7, Europe’s sick man. And we did it to ourselves in a bizarre act of national self-harm.

Brexit has directly impacted UK inflation levels, due to immigration controls and supply chain shortages. Citigroup, Standard Bank and Bank of America believe this means we will see higher inflation in the years to come. The London School of Economics published a report in April outlining how new trade barriers have fueled a 6 percent rise in our food prices.

The Tories, those architects of Brexit, are busy imploding, with the resignation of former Chancellor Rishi Sunak and former Health Secretary Sajid Javid pushing Boris Johnson’s chaotic administration to the brink. But even the so-called opposition cannot develop a backbone on the Brexit issue.

Keir Starmer said on Monday that “the UK will not return to the EU” under a Labor government, will not join a customs union and will not restore freedom of movement. According to Starmer, in a particularly laughable example of prevarication, there is no reason for Britain to rejoin the EU.

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If there’s one thing Starmer is really good at, it’s alienating voters, especially the ones Labor should be giving a voice to. Workers facing pay cuts in real terms, anyone vaguely on the left and now the Conservatives, and we’re left asking Starmer what he stands for (certainly not the 10 promises he was elected leader of the party for).

So now Brexit is here for Lurpak, and it’s not going to end there: price increases in food, gasoline, energy and rent, combined with wages that don’t keep pace with inflation, spell misery for all. U.S. Except, of course, if you’re an MP and have been given a £2,200 annual pay rise.

The promises on the side of a bus, the xenophobic rhetoric about “taking back control” – it worked, and now the chickens are coming home to roost. By the way, the price of chicken is skyrocketing, with the British Poultry Council citing “continued Brexit pressures” as the reason.

Well done Leavers, you win! Now enjoy it.

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